Commitment is a decision you make!

I received some emails concerning the post “Living in Fantasy-land while having an inkling that he may be gay” and some people told me my answer left much to be desired and a lady asked me: “what about her and his happiness?”. I still stand by my answer, they both went in with their eyes right open, wanting what they wanted and now they got what they wanted. They both got the marriage they were looking for, they made a commitment and to further that commitment, they brought two human beings to the equation. Well, commitment is a decision we make and decisions are not leaps we make or do, we make a decision after a concrete thought, an assessment, or at least that is what we should make and base our decisions, after careful consideration.

Before making a decision with objectivity, we should always ask ourselves “Is this going to be a smart move?  Are the people of quality in my life going to profit from this decision?”

Commitment is about what we are going to give.  People obsess about their happiness – “What about my happiness? Is this the right thing to do? Is it right for me?”  They are not thinking about giving, they are thinking about whether they are going to get everything that they want. The answer is NO, they aren’t going to get everything that they want, so is better to get on with reality and always base our decisions on concrete things, on reality, not emotions.

Emotions are not reality, but some people rely on their emotions for reality and that is not a good plan. Hopefully, her husband will rise to the occasion and show her that he really is the wonderful man she told me she married and stays with her to raise their babies together.

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